Kasper The Ghost

Isang buwan at dalawang linggo na ang nakalipas mula ng magbreak kami ni Kasper. Parang kailan lang ramdam ko pa ng sakit ng nangyaring break up na 'yon isang pangyayaring hindi ko inakalang mangyayari. Hindi naman kasi kami nag-away. Feeling ko ok kami. Feeling ko lang pala 'yon! Tinanong ko siya kung may iba na ba siya pero di naman sinagot tanong ko. Naisip ko tuloy kung hindi na ba niya ko talaga mahal o may iba ng (nilalandi) kinahuhumalingan. "Siguro nga yumi hindi ka na niya mahal eh kasi may iba na siya! gaga! Kailangan pa bang pag-isipan 'yan?! Bisyo na 'yan!" Hindi na pala niya ko love. Kaya pala lumipas ang isang linggo na hindi man lang siya nag-effort na magkita kami kahit text wala.

May nagawa ba kong mali? Anong kulang? BAKIT?????????

Ilang lang iyan sa mga tanong na paulit-ulit kong tinanong sa sarili ko noong time na 'yon. Kahit naman anong gawin kong isip hindi ko parin nakuha sagot. Masakit sa part ko .. sobra.. Pero sa kabila ng sakit na naramdaman ko ay wala siyang narinig na masama mula sakin. Walang galit na ipinaramdam sa kanya. Noong nagbreak kasi kami isa lang hiningi ko kay BRO.... hindi ang muling maging kami ni kasper kundi wag mabalutan ng galit ang puso ko... ang gusto ko lang matutong muling magpatawad even if it's unforgivable. Ayoko na kasing mangyari ang nangyari noong nagbreak kami ni Kerokeropi. Bitter kung bitter! Hanggang sa narealized ko na hindi ko na pala dapat aksayahin panahon at oras ko sa kanya. Salamat sa mga taong nagmalasakit sakin, nagbigay ng iba't - ibang opinyon at payo. Mula sa pagiging bitter nakamoved on ko .. muling nagmahal (kasper) .. nasaktan .. ngayon ay moving forward. Habang tumatagal unit-unting nagbabago feelings ko kay Kasper hindi pa man totally moved on... but he will just be the ghost of my past.

2011

IN lyf, I've done evry way of fyting. Heard every painful truth...been n every breaking scene, & felt every dreadful feeling. I thought going thru it all will den make me realize dat I hav 2 stop at least 2 save a little 4 myself.... But u knw wat's funny? ITS WEN I SEEM SO MUCH TIRED OF IT ALL.....but still I just can't quit no matter how hard it is. & I HAV 2 CONTINUE HOPING DAT 1 DAY.... I'll be able to find SOMEONE hu could LOVE me NOT just "RYT' but "REAL".

haha..

A Letter From My Auntie

Hello there, this is something specially for you. My handbook, I would like to share it with YOU.

HANDBOOK 2009

HEALTH:
Drink plenty of water.
Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
Eat more foods that grow in trees and plants and eat less foods that is manufactured in plants.
Live with the 3E's - Energy, Enthusiasm, and Emphaty.
Play more games.
Read more books than you did in 2008.
Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
Sleep for 7 hours.
Take a 10-30 minutes walk everyday. And while you walk, Smile
PERSONALITY:
Don't compare your life to others! You have no idea what their journey all about.
Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
Don't over do keep your limits.
Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
Dream more while you are awake and make your dreams come true.
Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
Forget issues of the past. That will ruin your present hapiness.
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
Don't hate others.
Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.
Problems are simply part of curriculum that appears and fade away like algebra class,
but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
Smile and laugh more, you don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
SOCIETY:
Call your family often.
Each day give something good to others.
Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
Try to make at least 3 people smile each day.
What other people think of you is none of your business.
Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
LIFE:
Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
No matter how you feel get up, dress up and show up. The best is yet to come.
When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
Your innermost is always happy. So be happy.

Greetings,
Emmy

Worth reading di ba? Tnx to tita.